Helping you get your life back and then living it to the full
If you feel like this when an opportunity comes your way….
…but you do it anyway, it makes you courageous.
Courage is not the absence of fear; it is doing it despite the fear.
Feel the fear and then GO FOR IT!
When the going gets tough, the tough get going.
Sometimes the ‘going‘ can look like you’re at a standstill.
I have been pushing, going like a mad woman, and working my tail off, yet I can seen very little progress. I could be discouraged or I could take time to notice that I have pushed a huge boulder half way up the side of the mountain and I still have strength to keep pushing.
There will be no stopping!
Keep pushing, keep working, keep providing resistance; do not stop.
Eventually something is going to give.
You know that moment when you’re about to do something kinda big, you’re nervous, and you feel completely out of your element?
I had one of those moments this morning.
It involved microphones, video cameras, and me pouring out passion from the depth of my heart and soul.
Whenever I get nervous, my bladder shrinks and I find myself in the bathroom more often you think is possible.
So before we started the filming, I made a pit stop.
I swear this message was written just for me today!
It made me laugh out loud and was exactly what I needed to remember in that moment.
Many people start things, stop them, and start them again.
Heck, I have a partially knitted sweater still ‘in progress‘ from last Christmas. It has been so left for so long that I am going to have to start over because I have no idea where I am any more.
A pile of wool, some work, and no pattern....pretty much where I am at! Time to start over....or just conveniently 'lose'.
In the very wise words of my mom, ‘The road to Hell is paved with good intentions.”
The problem with stopping is when you start again, you don’t always get to pick up where you left off.
One of the activities that I started and stopped in an effort to spend time with my husband doing something he enjoyed is river kayaking. We took a class that started in a swimming pool and eventually made its way to the North Saskatchewan river.
I am deathly afraid of boats. If you ever hear panicked screaming coming from a canoe on a still lake, I am in the boat. I would prefer to swim across a lake than get in a boat to cross it.
This is what I like to refer to as, 'Meeting Jesus face to face.'
Once I was strapped into that darned kayak, I promptly began to sweat right through my sexy neoprene outfit. Luckily the sweat was quickly washed away by my first ‘how to roll your kayak‘ lesson. Thank goodness someone created an easy to find loop so I could quickly pull the release hatch on the ‘skirt‘ and refrain from dying a very wet and upside down death.
I swallowed half that pool on the first night of class.
By the fourth class in the pool, the panic attacks in the change room before class were lessening and I stopped drinking most of the pool. Then we had a class on the North Saskatchewan river. I fasted and prayed from some sort of epic illness the night before that class, but I woke up healthy as ever and had no reason not to go.
SO scary. *rolls eyes* I swear it was windy AND rainy. It may look placid, but there is an epic undertow...I promise!
I pretty much sat in the kayak and screamed as the current took me down river.
Lesson #1 If you just sit there and complain, you are at the mercy of the current. For pity sake, put your paddle in the river!
Lesson #2 Paddling up river is hard work. You have to be stronger than the current to make any gains.
Lesson #3 As soon as you stop paddling you start to lose ground. Don’t stop paddling.
Lesson #4 No one appreciates a screamer.
Lesson #5 If boats make you hyperventilate, becoming a whitewater kayaker isn’t the smartest idea. Do something you love.
For three years straight I have trained hard, embraced bodybuilding, and eaten clean 95% of the time.
Its not because I am a superstar, hardcore, or amazing woman. I merely found something that I love to do and fuels my passions and strengths.
Some days I wake up and feel on top of the world.
Go me!
Other days I feel like hiding under the covers until a different day shows up.
Seriously?
Feelings come and go, but I am here to stay.
Yesterday I woke up listless and vaguely annoyed. I’m a woman. I am totally allowed to have such days or at least have a socially acceptable scapegoat for having such days.
All I wanted to do was crawl back into bed and magically have a maid come clean my house, a personal chef prep my meals, someone else do the daily workout out and graciously donate the calorie deficient and muscle growth to me, and my business grow all by itself.
Standing in front of the coffee pot that was nearly done brewing coffee for my morning wake up, I scrunched my eyes shut, hunched my shoulders, and took a few breaths.
Some days I work from home and others I am out meeting with clients and gone for 10-12 hours.
Getting to the gym, eating 4 ‘Figure Competitor OCD pre-measured‘ meals, and just being woman requires a lot of organization and ‘stuff‘.
Totally ridiculous, yes I know.
The daily trek to my car requires walking down a hallway, an elevator ride or 4 flights of stairs, two doors, another flight of stairs, and a walk through the parkade. Two trips to the car to load up for the day is a last resort.
I used to have a huge tote bag, filled to the brim with all of my emotions, helpful or not, and took them everywhere with me.
Feelings are things and you don’t have to take them with you, but you can if you want to. When they come, get curious about why and what they are and decide if they are worth cramming into your reusable Costco sized bags with your purse and groceries.
Sometimes I want to eat an Epic Salad while out and about, no matter how much tupperware it takes to make it happen. Other days…not so much.
One feeling isn’t better than another, they are things that you can take with you or leave on your kitchen counter. You are ALLOWED to take any and all feelings with you
Cram whatever feelings you want into your cooler, gym bag, briefcase, or purse and get on with what you have planned for your day. Some days I truly want to be sad, so I am sad. Feeling sad doesn’t mean that I don’t keep on with my life. I have big, audacious goals and dreams that will not be stopped by feeling sad or glad.
Show up, put in the work, and bring the feelings you want along for the craziness we call life.
Feeling and emotions add to your life, but they don’t have to drive or define you.
Or more aptly put, its the day I took charge of my life.
It was an idyllic Saturday and I was headed to a bodybuilding camp put on by INBF Canada. There was nothing idyllic about me that morning; I was a bundle of nerves, excited about what I was going to learn, brimming with questions, and over the moon about meeting Dr. Joe in person. We had only been working together for 5 days, but I was already a huge fan.
I towered a good 6 inches above most of the other participants, even thought I was just wearing kitten heels. I was unsure, scared, and wondered what the heck I was doing in this room of disciplined, focused, and muscled people.
Breaks and lunch time made me feel better because I ate salads, chicken, and vegetables just like the super lean people. I wanted to be buff and super lean and if they embraced the Epic Salad, well then I would too.
Inspired and overwhelmed was the dichotomy I felt leaving the venue that afternoon.
On the drive home, I took a turn that changed my life. Instead of going home and taking a nap, I drove to the nearest Starbucks, drank one of my last lattes, and made a plan.
You get to choose.
Since August 30, 2010 I have chosen to get up early, plan my day, dream big, work hard, and see what is possible and then go after it with my whole heart.
Good morning! It’s 5 am and I’m up. Its the first day of the rest of my life. Got up, no snooze, and I made the bed. I am choosing focus, clarity, and momentum. Not only am I going to be a bodybuilder, I am going to be a Fabulousloree. Every single day I will get up at 5 am, work on my goals, and then start my day. I must learn the discipline of positive thinking. HAVE TO. Its time to dream, set goals, eat, train, and work like a champion. I am tired, but today it is the most fabulous feeling in the world.
And I chose to keep doing it until it happened without thinking too much about it. My muscles of discipline, positive thinking, and self esteem have grown to become lean and powerful.
We are all very committed and disciplined; its just the ‘to what’ that differs.
I used to be disciplined at:
We think the world is just how it is and there is no changing it. If you change yourself, for better or worse, I promise you world will change accordingly.
Don’t wait until tomorrow to start living your full, amazing, and passionate life.
Life is a crock pot, not a microwave. What smells do you want to invade every nook and cranny of your life while it simmers to create your feast?
Wearing smaller pants and having Gertrude slowly diminish requires me to constantly answer the question, ‘What did you do to lose the weight?!?!‘.
I think 98% of North American women believe the lie that being skinny makes you happy.
Don’t forget to add these other gems to the ‘makes you happy‘ list.
It wouldn't MAKE me happy....but it COULD make me HAPPIER. Just being honest!
I am the happiest I have ever been and am in the best shape of my life, but going to the gym, eating clean, and competing does not make me happy.
My happiness does not come from being armpit deep in a rather strange subculture called bodybuilding where you stand on a stage and are judged based purely on your appearance. First place is deemed by a panel of judges that assess you based on your tone, symmetry, beauty, conditioning, and who the heck really knows what else.
Honestly, once its all over and you find yourself profusely scrubbing bikini bite and pro tan off your arse, you had better know who you are no matter if you came in first, last, or somewhere in between.
So I am skinnier than I used to be, have biceps that have been known to interrupt meetings, and have a great job. Three years ago I had pretty much all the same outside things and was possibly the most miserable woman on the planet.
Fulfillment and joy doesn’t come from ‘out there‘, it comes from living out your life’s purpose and being who you were created to be, ‘skinny‘ or not.
Go chase your dreams and over time your pant size will matter less and your impact, purpose, and reason for getting up in the morning will matter more. I am slowing getting there.
Besides, I never, ever want to be skinny.
I want to be lean, fast, and strong like a lioness. I want to have the soul of a lioness who chases down her dreams and feasts on them.
Being backstage, all alone for your first competition is one of the scariest things you’ll do, unless there is a fabulous competitor that knows and practices the ‘Tan Rule’. Tenecia shares her experience with the ‘Tan Rule’ and how it impacted her.
Everyone knows The Golden Rule…you know…the whole “do unto others as you would have them do unto you”. Today, I would like to talk to you about The Tan Rule. This rule is the first cousin of The Golden Rule.
One freaked out competitor!
On July 24, 2010, I arrived at the Mesa Arts Center to compete in my first figure competition. I was excited, scared, overwhelmed, giddy, nervous, and most importantly, ALONE! I did not have any friends or members of my gym that were competing in the show. No trainer to accompany me backstage.
As I huddled backstage after checking in and receiving my competitor number, I wondered what I was supposed to do next. There were over 200 competitors at this particular show and everyone seemed to know someone else, what they needed to be doing, and how to ignore the obvious newbie hyperventilating in the corner.
Just as I was about to start doing the ugly cry, a tall (and I mean seriously tall!) Black female said hello to me and stated that she hoped she hadn’t stolen some of my “spot” as she pointed to some bags that were next to mine. She told me that her name was Jenny and asked me my name and who I had backstage with me. After telling her my name and explaining about it being my first show, I told her that I was alone because my coach lived out-of-state. Jenny must have smelt the fear that was seeping out of my pores because the next thing she said to me was, “Stay with me. My trainer will be backstage and we’ll help you out with whatever you need”
Jenny, my savior, in the red
She and I talked and talked which made the time fly by quickly. As the time for our class to get on stage drew nearer, Jenny and her trainer told me when to have my carbs and pump up, they both helped me with my glaze and Bikini Bite, and her trainer made suggestions about how to tweak my posing to hit my best angles. When I left pre-judging, I happily told my husband about Jenny, the girl who saved me from a breakdown backstage!
Jenny rockin’ the stage at Team Universe
That was over a year ago and Jenny and I have remained in contact with one another. We have celebrated each other’s successes and offered support when placings have been less than stellar. Jenny competed at Team Universe a few weeks ago and I proudly lent her my suit for her national debut. She initially wanted to rent the suit from me but I told her NO! and that letting her borrow my suit was the least I could do to repay for her taking me under her wing at my first show.
Jenny and I at my show on 7/16/11
I share that story with you to encourage those of you who compete, especially those of you who would consider yourself “veterans” or “seasoned competitors” to practice The Tan Rule.
It states “Backstage, treat a new competitor as you would have wanted to be treated at your first show”. You may be asking yourself, what exactly does that consist of? People, it’s simple – help someone or more than someone out. Share your glaze if the girl next to you in the pump up room doesn’t have any. Offer to take a picture of a competitor with her camera so she has memories of the day (especially if you see her doing the whole extending her arm self-portrait thing). Offer one of your tampons if you hear someone freaking out that she’s just started her period (this actually happened at one of my shows!).
Now at every one of my shows, I try to be someone else’s Jenny. Yes, I focus on me and what I need to do to be ready and prepared for my moment to shine but I also try to be friendly and approachable. I do this so competitors, especially first timers, can see a friendly face and feel a little less overwhelmed.
The Tan Rule…I hope you take it to heart and practice it at your shows.
Until next time…..
Tenecia.
This morning, as per usual, I woke up at 4:30 and popped in my thyroid medication. Then, as per unusual, I went back to bed.
I chose to go back to bed because today was my 3 hour metabolic function test. I just couldn’t fathom being awake that long and not being able to eat, drink water, or sip on a glorious cup of coffee.
Beautiful and scary....
Freakish. Check out the corner of 'blue' in the top right...tornado anyone?
And I mean rolled in like a freight train. They sounded like a train yard and were coming faster than you could say, “apocalypse“.
The lightening flashed, the rain fell in dime-sized drops, and more ominous clouds kept rolling in.
Jon and I looked at each other while he got his biking gear together. Somehow sending my husband out in the storm riding on a lightening rod with only a poncho and a plastic helmet to protect him from the elements did not seem like the wisest idea. He could take the car and I could take transit.
Heck, that’s what my cute gortex rain coat is for.
The storm was epic for about an hour. I battened down the hatches in the condo and got ready to go. By the time I was ready to go in my super cute coat, most of the storm had passed.
This testing seemed a tad bit ‘apocalyptic‘ to me and I was nervous, but I remembered that I get to choose my attitude, response, and thoughts.
Like Kari said, "Make 'em wonder what you're smiling about!" Done.
I met the most amazing team of nurses a the U of A Hospital’s Clinical Investigation Unit. A man named Steven was in charge and he was one of the best nurses I have ever met in my whole life. He truly cared about his work and intrinsically knew he was making a difference, was curious about the patients, and kept everything running on time and without a hitch.
Thirty-three vials of blood and tons of information on what the world is or is not happening in my body.
This one one of the TWO racks that ended up getting filled. Thank you Jesus for the person that invented the IV.
Perhaps the answer to the question, “What is a Donloree?” will finally be revealed!
Both the storm and the testing were intense and a tad crazy, but there was also excitement and anticipation and neither lasted that long in the whole scheme of life.
I can’t wait to see what comes of these tests.
Good thing I don’t have wait a moment longer to be the woman I want to be; I can choose it today.
Choose to be who you want to be tomorrow, today.
Tomorrow never comes. You only have today so make it great.
You need to do life with people so that when you start to drown in the ocean of life you have amazing people that will throw you a life preserver.
Cheryl Glattacker has thrown me MANY life preservers over the last year.
I am absolutely blessed to have her in my life. She is an amazing woman, wife, business owner, trainer, and Pro Bodybuilder with the WNBF.
She was kind enough to sit down and do an interview about competing, training, and the balancing act we all call life!
I want to be like Cheryl when I grow up!
What are your goals with competing?
My personal goal is always to be better on stage than the previous event. This means a better physique, a polished routine and perfect posing, all while still having fun and enjoying life. This year in particular my goal is better legs and a wider lat spread. So far I’m off to a good start. I trained like a mad woman during offseason and made nutrition a priority, coupled with staying relatively lean, all made for visible results going into on season.
What is your best advice for building muscle?
Form, form, form!!! I don’t care how much weight you can push, press or pull, lighten the weight and focus on your form and the results will come, then slowly increase the weight, but only if you remain true to proper form. Nutrition is very important for building muscle as well. Too much food can be just as detrimental as too little food. Your pre-workout meal and your post-workout meals are two of the most important meals of the day. Don’t be afraid of carbohydrates, they are your friend, especially after a great workout, your muscles are screaming for you to feed them carbs.
Form? CHECK!
How do you transition from off season to on season?
My most recent off season was a very strict one. I allowed myself four days in Vegas of non-tracking food and eating freely, as well as two weeks in Maui of the same sort of thing. I otherwise follow a very strict offseason program and am never without trainers and coaches. Offseason isn’t about eating craptastic food for me and getting fluffy. The less weight I have to lose for a show, the better. I’ve been there, done that, and I don’t want to go down that path again, for heaven’s sake it was paved with peanut M&M’s!!!! So this year the off/on season transition for me was a mental transition. My focus and discipline changes. I listen to my body more and if it hurts or needs rest, I’ll give in. The massage visits increase to weekly, and chiropractor/active release therapy sessions increase to twice a week.
What advice would you give to a competitor who wants to earn their pro card?
With dedication, desire, and discipline anything is possible. Dream big, be patient, be kind, be consistent, be grateful, and most of all enjoy the journey that gets you to the stage because that’s ultimately what it’s about.
How do you define all natural?
In the context of bodybuilding, it means free from any illegal drugs or prescription drugs that may be banned from the federation in which you plan on competing in. Usually the time frame to be “clean” is seven years from the date of competition. A polygraph test is required before getting on stage, as well as urine testing. As a WNBF Pro, I am subject to random drug testing as well. I am a lifetime natural bodybuilder.
As for food, the term natural to me is very much a part of my lifestyle as is natural bodybuilding. My rule of thumb is if the food you’re about to eat didn’t have a mother or a root than you really shouldn’t be consuming it. If a food has a shelf life longer than the life of an average dog, you need to question how healthy that is going into your body. If the ingredients aren’t simple and I can’t pronounce them, it’s not worth my money. Bodybuilding is about longevity and health.
What are the best and worst parts of competing?
The best, by far, are the relationships you develop with fellow competitors. It really is a small percentage of people that will compete, so you feel an instant connection with fellow competitors. Sharing stories, recipes, all the ups and downs that come with each journey, and then ultimately the back stage fun we have. Gluing all our naughty bits into those tiny posing suits and getting our dream tan applied, usually by complete strangers, whom by the end of the show will help wipe the tears of joy away from your cheeks. These are the moments you treasure.
As for the worst parts, yes, there are bad parts to competing, I don’t like to focus on them, and if I do have a bad day, I move past them as quickly as I can, with some self talk and some crazy frantic journal writing or a good cry. In general though, I’m pretty lucky to have a husband who not only supports my crazy hobby, he is proud of me and helps me out significantly in many aspects. He also prefers home cooked meals to restaurant meals so I’m not often subjected to having to go out for meals. As for competing itself, now that I hold my pro card, I have to travel in order to compete. This can be costly. Both shows for me this year are in NYC, one in September and then again in November.
I am excited to watch Cheryl compete in her first Pro INBF show this fall – Worlds in NYC.
Connect with Donloree!